Rocket Science, pure Rocket Science.....
Caveman Test
22 WAYS TO BE A GOOD DEMOCRAT - IT'S NOT SO HARD -
EVEN A CAVEMAN CAN DO IT....
1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion
on demand.
2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and govern-
ments create prosperity.
3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens
are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands
of Chinese and North Korean communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are more affected
by soccer-moms driving SUVs than by scientifically documented
cyclical changes in the earth's climate.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homo-
sexual is natural.
7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of
federal funding.
8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach fourth
graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids
about sex.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony
activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than
actually doing something to build it.
11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own
money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.
12. You have to believe that the NRA is bad because it supports
certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good
because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are
too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are
more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson,
Thomas Edison, and Alexander Graham Bell.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial-
quotas and set-asides are not.
16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very
nice person.
17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked
anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been
in charge.
18. You have to believe that conservatives telling the truth belong in
jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.
19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag,
transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected,
and manger-scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the
Chinese Government is somehow in the best interest to the
United States
21. You have to believe that it's okay to give federal workers the day off
on Christmas Day, but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."
22. You have to believe that this message is part of a vast right wing
conspiracy.
Yes!....even a caveman could figure this one out!
Caveman Test
22 WAYS TO BE A GOOD DEMOCRAT - IT'S NOT SO HARD -
EVEN A CAVEMAN CAN DO IT....
1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion
on demand.
2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and govern-
ments create prosperity.
3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens
are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands
of Chinese and North Korean communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are more affected
by soccer-moms driving SUVs than by scientifically documented
cyclical changes in the earth's climate.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homo-
sexual is natural.
7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of
federal funding.
8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach fourth
graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids
about sex.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony
activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than
actually doing something to build it.
11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own
money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.
12. You have to believe that the NRA is bad because it supports
certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good
because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are
too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are
more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson,
Thomas Edison, and Alexander Graham Bell.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial-
quotas and set-asides are not.
16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very
nice person.
17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked
anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been
in charge.
18. You have to believe that conservatives telling the truth belong in
jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.
19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag,
transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected,
and manger-scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the
Chinese Government is somehow in the best interest to the
United States
21. You have to believe that it's okay to give federal workers the day off
on Christmas Day, but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."
22. You have to believe that this message is part of a vast right wing
conspiracy.
Yes!....even a caveman could figure this one out!